«Women with Disabilities — Myths and Reality 2020»
4:20 a.m., Saturday, December 5, 2010, the following letter was sent to my e-mail:
«I’m sorry that I am writing this emotional letter to you!» I feel a great need. Yesterday, at the forum, I wanted to thank all women for every their speech and hug them because everything that was said is familiar to me, it’s like about me.
Due to COVID-19, many online events have been conducted and I’ve mastered this ZOOM program…
I am listening to seminars, webinars, and lectures all day long, it helps me to switch and not get sour at home. It does not seem that I am alone. I found this women’s forum thanks to an acquaintance. I was not going to speak at this forum, I just wanted to listen to it.
However, there was something that touched me right away — it was an orange color on the banner 16 DAYS AGAINST VIOLENCE.
And the first words of Tatiana about physical and psychological violence against women with disabilities…. These words overwhelmed me with memories and got to my heart … And I have been hiding them for so many years! I have been hiding them in my soul from myself in order to forget and somehow live on.
FOR THE FIRST TIME, I heard openly that a woman with a disability is not protected from psychological violence that this is a problem that has turned out to be a grief not only in my life.
Earlier they said — SHOW US YOUR BLUES — EVERYTHING ELSE IS YOUR FANTASY.
And when this woman talked about the psychological violence she is going through now, I just wanted to stand by her and beg people to be merciful because no one has the right to destroy other people’s FAITH»
I received this letter by e-mail at 4:00 a.m.
I saw it because I was already working on the article. It turns out that a member of the Forum who was with us all five hours yesterday feels the same way I do now.
So, at 4 a.m. I heard a story, one of the thousands that happen nearby. The story of how VIOLENCE went beyond the terrible WORD and turned into action.
Even after changing her name, my interlocutor did not agree to tell in the article what she went through and what ruined her female and professional destiny.
She was crying and I was crying together with her because I understand that there are very few girls among my close friends and acquaintances who did not feel psychological pressure and as if I see those who have faced violence and bullying personally.
How can we counteract these manifestations of violence when the word itself is alarming, to say nothing of actions?
Probably the first thing — if possible, do not be silent.
If you can’t speak? If you can’t express everything?
If you do not have an opportunity to escape?
If you do not know where to run?
If you do not have strength and money if you do not see where to go if you do not have information if you have only physical pain and need for care.
If you do not have protection.
But you feel only despair.
I PROMISED HER AS TO PARTICIPANTS OF YESTERDAY MEETING THAT WE WOULD WORK FURTHER ON EVERY TOPIC WE SPOKE ABOUT WITH THE SUPPORT OF ORGANIZATIONS AND INSTITUTIONS THAT ARE INTERESTED IN THE PROTECTION OF RIGHTS OF WOMEN WITH DISABILITIES.
In addition, the topic of combating violence will be the first.
As for psychological violence.
It seems to me that psychological violence is a poisonous gas — its manifestations are many, and it cannot be identified visually, but it leads to poisoning and even death.
Psychological violence is insidious.
… .. — Give us FACTS — bruises, pieces of evidence on paper, bynames that spoke about you, just for you….
…. Show me where do you see that poisonous gas? Where is it? Is it fixed visually? No, in such a way it does not exist….
Psychological violence exists not only in the family. NO.
There are women and mothers who tell about psychological abuse in social institutions, when they receive certificates for children, or when they pass a Medical and Social Expert Commission in children’s educational institutions.
Yes… Mothers feel psychological pressure in the fight for inclusive programs for their children at school that are prescribed in the certificate of the Inclusive Resource Center.
Psychological violence happens when a girl tries to get a certificate of care, and the Department of Social Protection seems to be playing with her «Who’s the master of the house?» She has no one to protect her, she rides for 30 km on a scooter here and there, not only to protect her rights but also not to break down personally.
A woman with a disability, a mother of two children, suffered psychological trauma because she was warned about the reduction after the maternity leave. Only her position was cut.
And, finally…. Psychological violence that has become so popular on the social network with impunity and that is normal nowadays.
Despite the fact that human rights organizations make many efforts to protect human rights — the leaders highlighted the fact of psychological violence that few people talk about:
How does it happen that there are terrible cases when psychological violence and bullying, like a tamed alligator, are in the heart of a human rights organization? Isn’t it scary when a human rights activist is the trainer of such an alligator?!
And I tell myself DO NOT be silent ….. Yes.
I have experienced terrible psychological violence that is no secret to many. In a social network that is open to all. And it already applies to my child and family and causes psychological trauma. Another one in my life.
If it was not said by those who tell about PROMOTION OF CONSTRUCTIVE PROPOSALS, ETHICS, COOPERATION, and PEACE AMONG CIVIL SOCIETY.
What is going on?
In 2012, together with a UNDP team and fellow human rights activists, I visited the Office of the United Nations High Commissioner for Human Rights.
I received the best training in my life.
What did I feel?
I FELT FAITH IN THE LAW, UNCONDITIONAL FAITH IN LAW AND UNCONDITIONAL RESPECT FOR MAN.
If there are some errors, let us fix them together.
If there are problems, we will look for solutions together.
If I do not see, we will help to see.
If I do not hear, we will help to hear.
If I do not understand, we will help to understand.
A person with a disability is a part of human diversity, but it is necessary to take into account psychological and physical peculiarities of women, children, and men.
A RIGHT IS NOT A BALL…
Each of us has the ONLY CHANCE never to feel domestic, social, and psychological violence, ONLY IN OPPOSITION TO IT AND IN RESTORING A CULTURE OF RESPECT FOR EVERYONE.
Organizer of the event: Public organization «Luhansk region organization «Association of women, youth, families with disabilities of Eastern Donbass — East «(NGO «LOO «AMI-EAST»)
At the All-Ukrainian level, the event is supported by:
The Office of the Government Commissioner for the Rights of Persons with Disabilities, the Department of Youth Policy of the Ministry of Youth and Sports of Ukraine, the UNHCR Agency for Refugees, the International Women’s Club of Kyiv, the National Assembly of Persons with Disabilities of Ukraine, the Ukrainian Medical Lyceum named after O.O. Bogomolets.
With the support of the Office of the Commissioner for the Rights of Persons with Disabilities under the President of Ukraine.
At the regional level, the event is supported by: the Department of Youth and Sports of Luhansk Regional State Administration, Public Institution “Luhansk Regional Center for Socio-Cultural Adaptation of Youth with Disabilities”.
Версія українською мовою https://ami-cxid.org/peredumova-dlya-oglyadu-vseukrainskogo-forumu/